It crossed my mind today that this could be my last Christmas. If it was, what would I do? What would I try to accomplish with my children and my husband? Who would I call and make up with? What would really matter? Wow. I was a straight up buz-kill to myself!!
It’s not as if I know any bad news or anything, so why the morbidity? A Christmas song came on the radio and I realized something awesome. First off, that I’m alive and here today and that should be my focus. (the Bible orders us to refrain from worrying about tomorrow…) And that I’m usually pretty depressed about Christmas but the last few years have been very different – no sadness at all! Take that morbid kitty!!
So what matters is today. Not the worries that nag me or the things that didn’t get done. I’ve focused on that and had a pretty darned awesome day. Earlier, I was able to catch some wonderful couple time with my husband and tonight my kiddos and I will watch Charlie Brown Christmas on tv together – eating our dinner off of tv trays. This isn’t the stuff of movies, but it’s what my life is today.
Later, I’ll ponder the future and when anxiety creeps back in, I’ll open my Bible. There’s no way I’m going back to being unable to enjoy the most wonderful time of the year. I’m sharing this to say to someone that is worried or preoccupied or filled with anxiety: worry is not of God. Focus on enjoying what ever you can today. The rest will take care of itself…
25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life[a]?
28 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29 Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? 31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
An awesome blogger couple I know is doing an Advent Tree this Christmas… That’s a wonderful idea that I’m adding to my to do list here.